She is searching for recipes on the Internet. She found a video of herself having sex

WARNING: This story contains details of intimate partner violence that may be disturbing to those who have experienced violence or know someone who has experienced violence.

Natalie Brown sat down one day to search for recipes on the Food Network. But another website that started with an “F” immediately popped up – Fetlife, a Canadian social networking site for those interested in fetishes – and on it she discovered a video of herself engaging in sexual acts that she didn’t know she had. Film.

“I felt so humiliated. I felt stupid, embarrassed, scared,” Brown said in a recent interview at her Halifax apartment.

Brown, 39, said she later learned her partner filmed the footage while she was blindfolded (at his request) and then shared the footage on Fetlife.

Brown’s now ex-partner Conor Dolan was charged in April 2024 with voyeurism and non-consensual distribution of intimate images. He initially pleaded not guilty in Dartmouth provincial court.

watch |Natalie Brown said when she discovered a nude video of her online:

Ultimately, prosecutors dropped the voyeurism charge in exchange for a guilty plea to the distribution charge, thus preventing Brown from having to testify at trial. On January 6, Dolan was sentenced to four months of conditional imprisonment, commonly known as house arrest, based on a joint recommendation by prosecutors and defense. He will have a criminal record.

Encouraged by the convictions and driven by a recent spate of killings in Nova Scotia — where police say six women were killed by their partners in the past three months as a result of intimate partner violence — the 39-year-old Brown asked the court to vacate her conviction.

She also wants people to understand the challenges she faced in getting intimate photos of herself removed from the internet.

Connor Dolan (right) awaits sentencing outside a court in Dartmouth, Nova Scotia. (Chris Monetta/CBC)

Paul Neaver, the crown attorney prosecuting Dolan’s case, said in an interview that prison terms are usually reserved for cases involving “revenge porn,” where someone shares the image with the intent to harm the victim.

“In this case, we don’t have that factor,” he said.

Dolan, who has no record, declined an interview request but said he was “very sorry” when asked by the court if he had anything to say.

‘A huge loss of privacy’

In handing down the sentence, Judge Tim Daley told Dolan, 43, that he could face jail time if the case went to trial.

“This is intimate partner sexual abuse online. Make no mistake about it. It constitutes a huge loss of privacy,” Daley said.

According to a statement of facts agreed in court, Brown’s face and upper body were not visible in the 12 seconds of video, but her lower body was completely nude. The video was filmed at the home they share, and the profile photo on the account shows Dolan holding her dog. Her voice was also audible. The judge said she was identifiable.

watch | Natalie Brown asks judge to lift publication ban protecting her identity:

Fetlife claims to have millions of members, but the exact number is unknown, the statement said. The company said the video was posted 14 days before Brown discovered it in September 2019, but remained online and in public view for four years.

In 2019, Dolan told Brown he had deleted the video, but in fact he just deactivated it.

He told her he posted the video to demonstrate his skills in attracting sexual partners and that it had “nothing to do with her,” the statement said.

He also told her he had mental health issues, including a “pornography/sex addiction”. He attended therapy sessions for several months, and she attended some of his sessions in an attempt to continue their relationship.

The relationship eventually ended amicably in December 2019, and the two continued to share custody of the dog.

Shocked to find the video is still online

Four years later, at the suggestion of a friend, Brown checked the site and was surprised to find the footage still existed.

An agreed statement of facts said Fetlife’s administrative logs showed Dolan reactivated the account five months after Brown discovered it, even though he had not used the account since the reactivation and ultimately in January 2024 The account was deleted on the 28th.

Brown sobbed as her victim impact statement was read aloud in court. Because the site can match people by location, she worried that her friends, coworkers and neighbors might have seen the film.

“The idea that anyone can reduce my body, my autonomy, my dignity, my humanity to something for their consumption without my consent is intolerable.”

Dolan sat with his eyes downcast.

“The statement you read here today is extraordinary, coming from an extraordinary woman who has demonstrated extraordinary strength and resilience,” the judge said.

Brown said the judge made her feel heard.

Brown said it was helpful to have a Nova Scotia judge’s words validate her experience and feelings after intimate photos of her were shared online without her consent. (Chris Monetta/CBC)

“It helped me a lot to finally get to this point and have a judge validate what I was going through and call it real,” she said in the interview.

As soon as Brown discovered the video in 2019, he began trying to get Fetlife to remove it from its servers. She said the site told her it couldn’t remove the video because it was Dolan’s property and it couldn’t verify she was the person in the video.

watch | Talking about her experience with intimate partner violence:

CyberSCAN unit intervenes to delete video

Brown ultimately contacted Nova Scotia’s CyberSCAN unit, which operates under the provincial Privacy Imaging and Internet Protection Act. The unit, which has handled an average of 200 cases a year since its establishment in 2013, can help remove images, and it did so in this case.

Fetlife did not respond to questions from CBC News about its policies.

Brown said she spoke out because there is still a stigma around intimate partner violence that needs to be removed so that people feel they can come forward without judgment.

She also hopes to raise awareness about the difficulties she encountered in accessing resources and the justice system.

She said waiting lists for consultations were too long and more funding was needed.

Emma Arnold, an attorney at the nonprofit law firm People’s Center for Advocacy and Change, said more and more people are experiencing violence as a result of domestic violence. (Chris Monetta/CBC)

Emma Arnold is an attorney at the Center for People’s Advocacy and Change, a Dartmouth nonprofit law firm that provides pro bono and low-bono services to improve access to justice. Violence.

She applauded Brown’s initiative.

“A lot of people don’t know that the harm they’re experiencing is actually illegal.”

Brown wants people to know that while the fight for justice can be difficult, it’s worth it.

“Every time I get scared, I think, ‘You’re not just doing this for yourself,'” she said. “‘You’re doing this for every woman who has to bear the shame.'”

For anyone affected by domestic or intimate partner violence, support is available through: Crisis hotlines and local support services. If you are in immediate danger or fear for your safety or the safety of others around you, call 911.